If you find yourself in
love with someone who does not love you, be gentle with yourself. There
is nothing wrong with you. Love just didn't choose to rest in the other
person's heart.
If you find someone else in love with you and
you don't love him/her, feel honored that love came and called at your
door, but gently refuse the gift you cannot return. Do not take
advantage, do not cause the pain.
How you deal with love is how you deal with you, and all our hearts feel
the same pains and joys, even if our lives and ways are different.
If you fall in love with another, and he/she falls in love with you,
and then love chooses to leave, do not try to reclaim it or to assess
blame, let it go. There is a reason and there is a meaning. You will
know in time.
Remember that you don't choose love. Love chooses
you. All you can really do is accept it for all its mystery when it
comes into your life. Feel the way it fills you to overflowing, then
reach out and give it away.
Give it back to the person who
brought it alive in you.Give it to others who deem it poor in
spirit.Give it to the world around you in anyway you can.
There
is where many lovers go wrong. Having been so long without love, they
understand love only as a need. They see their hearts as empty places
that will be filled with love, and they begin to look at love as
something that flows to them rather than from them.
The first
blush of new love is filled to overflowing, but as their love cools,
they revert to seeing their love as need. They cease to be someone who
generates love and instead become who seeks love.
They forget that the secret of love is that it is a gift, and that it can be made to grow only by giving it away.
Remember this, and keep it to your heart. Love has its own time, its
own seasons, and its own reason for coming and going. You cannot bribe
it or coerce it, or reason it into staying. You can only embrace it when
it arrives and give it away when it comes to you. But if it chooses to
leave from your heart or from the heart of your lover, there is nothing
you can do and there is nothing you should do.Love always has been and
always will be a mystery.Be glad that it came to live for a moment in
your life.
- Kent Nerburn
